Out of Control

I remember when my my daughter, 3 days old, had to get the bottom of her foot pricked for a mandatory newborn screening. I cried as hard as she did. I can remember every vaccine visit...even the one time she didn't cry, (I still did) I think she was 6 months old...we thought it was odd, but good. The time she dragged her thumb across a broken window and we had to make the decision to take her for stitches or just wrap it up tight...she still has a scar...she was 2. I remember her at 4 years old having to go for a chest x-ray to rule out pneumonia, we gave breathing treatments every 4 hours until she got better. Strep throat, chicken pox (and cutting off her ponytail as her dad slept), multiple bumps, bruises and scrapes...Now that she is 15 (almost 16) I still worry about her health and safety whenever she is not in my sight.

I remember when my son (1 years old) tumbled from the top of the stairs to the bottom, slowly and almost gracefully until the splat on the hardwood floor...he was fine, I was not. There have been many times when he was not fine, when an incident led to an ER visit and a diagnosis of a broken bone (or two)...this is to be expected when you have brittle bone disease...we've learned to manage our frailness.

Children heal and forget about shots, broken bones, cuts, scrapes and even pneumonia. They forget about the time they put their hand on the hot stove, got stung by a bee or slipped on a wet floor. A parent does not.

I will never forget the day, June 16, 2009, when my child was given an MRI to rule out "something" that could cause a sudden case of lazy eye. I will equally never forget the day, June 17, 2009, when I received the message that the MRI was normal.

There are certain controls that a parent is given, certain safety measures they can take and rules they can enforce. And then there are certain things that are not in our control. It is these uncontrollables that will give us our faith, our reason for believing in God. It is these uncontrollables that will also give us our distinguished greys, multiple wrinkles and high blood pressure!